To go or not to go

Leave the soul, a little piece of it

Enter the garden of eden,
The fruits aren't forbidden anymore,
The enigmatic rivers launder the brain
It's only a little soul after all.

Keep your soul, the whole of it,
Enter the unpaved path,
Be wary of lizards or butterflies
Monsters or angels, tulips or titan arums.
The soul is intact, may be.

Garden of Edens is the plethora of gaiety,
The unmapped pavement to mystery; alluring!!!

Game of Cards

Three players shuffled cards for life.

One; able, won all the rounds.

Two; blindly played hoping to win.

Three; unable and aware, will never win,

Kept playing, fetching only spare points.

                            

Last night I died, my soul cried 

Can I be Jesus and reincarnate? 

My men need me, the young and the old.

Many have tried to kill me, 

They impaired my brain, 

My rugged soul stayed intact.

Last night, my soul quivered,

The threat of my one man being no man

You can do what they couldn't 

Blemish my skin, soul and gray matter.

My love, Just look around me,

I'm in a black hole, I have no escape 

My hands are free, but no anchor can save me

My voice is loud, but no ears can hear me 

I see you, bright and vivid... 

I see your stretched hand, I see your antsy eyes 

But you cannot hear me, you cannot see me

Your eyes seek me, your loved ones seek u

I fear I will pull you down,

Into my black hole, a dearth of no return.

Yet my heart yearns,

Find me, oh my love, please find me

Hold my hand

Careless my hair

Forgive my fretful cribbing

And preserve me in your warmth

I will cry, I will whine, I will bicker

Hold me tight and not let me go 

Or I will die, my soul will wither. 

Thanksgiving 2016

Thank you for that sun that rose in the west,

Showed me all the stars hidden in the east.

Thank you for that moon shining in the north  

Refrains my serotonin from going to the south. 

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Yellow corridor

The corridor was long and yellow,

With red doors on either sides,

Each one opened to a unique story

At 5'3", she stood short, shrunk 

Gazing at him walking away.

His maroon shirt and black backpack,

Blanketed his heavy, ponderous heart.

The one she knew had room for her. 

It is only a few hours and

He would be back

She could write, read and learn

Or she could take care of a child

She had resources to pass the time,

It is only a few hours after all.

Yet, she knew....

One day he would walk that corridor 

The same yellow long one with red doors

And she would stand there, short and shrunk

Not knowing if he would be back.

What would she do?

When uncertainty persists,

She might diminish to infinity,

She might recoil to detonate

Or she might prosper and thrive,

To become the queen of the castle.

Right now, it is only a few hours

And he will be back,

Clad in his maroon shirt and bearing a light backpack. 

Love and friendship

Watching Love and Friendship with only 3 other people in the theatre than us... A rough morning with "whatsapp trolling" hopefully will be made up with the movie!!! Phew...! 

When love is lost, seek friends! 

In Geetha

I perused the stanzas of "Geetha" one after the other,

Fervently seeking the mastery of "I".

Searching the answers I seek,

Striving to crack His code
Being my own scout in espionage.

Neither need I attain Brahma nor undying gaiety.

All I whim is a good night sleep,

With my senses not at the land of risen sun

Following an eensy ray of sunlight to

To ebb my vitamin D deficiency.

No! I do not have rickets,
Just the cognitive infirmities that come with it.

Frantic, I read as many pages as I could.

Oh Krishna, I wondered, is it my naviety or the author's brevity

That's making these chapters arduous?

At last night, as my weary self catnapped 

Ears still alert for the buzzing of a note.

He came to me, He came to me!

"Oh Krishna, my Lord, what took you so long", I whined.

Wasn't my devotion ardent?

Weren't my payers loud, my rituals right

Or is it that my flowers weren't bright?
Bless me the answers I seek, I cried.

"I beg thee my lord! Please tell me, please tell me"

"Let me sleep tonight, as calm as my Child next to me".

"Is my agony the reward I bidded"? 

"My lord, kanaiya, I plead thee, Save me!

"Do not cry my Child", He said...

"You are the answers your seek"

Mystified, I opened my eyes, tearful as ever.

Oh lord, you left me awake, 

how many more restive nightfalls shall I endure,

To discern these answers you left unanswered!

That big water falls

If I gather all the tears I cry for you,

And convene all the ache I cannot eschew,

I can lay out a colossal water fall,

So monumental, it will put Chutes de Khones to shame.

I wish to drown deep into it, never to

Be on your face again, never to 

Crawl on your brain again. 

Yet, deep in the darkness of repose 

when water fills my nostrils & 

lungs gasp for oxygen, 
Before ears go numb,  
Before I sink back up,

And after the colors start to fade,

Alas, The heart will wish against all my wills,

To be seen by you, to be held to safety by you.
If you appear, do not take me home.
Ride with me there where I wish to be-

In the land of the rainbows and the reindeers.
There I go, deluded by my weary sanity Again!
I do know, I do know. 
You wouldn't come.... You cannot come....
You are at a chateau, far far away where
Bedrooms are furnished with roses and tulips
Living room adorned with sweet candies and unicorns.
Then some orchids and cacti fill the empty spaces.
You are there, your abode, too far away,
The thick white walls immune to the whomping of the falls.

Will there be a day?

Will there be a day again, when I skim 

Through 1000 faces & catch a glimpse of u?

Will there be a day again, when
We wake up from our realities & I'm beside you?

Will there be a day again, when 
I stare into the empty walls, too shy to meet your eyes?

Will there be a day again, when
You ploy a skillful deceit for me to
fall in love FOR you. 

Will there be a day again, when I slip deep

Into your chest and weep vehemently?

Will there be a day again, when I hold

Tight to your arms, not to let go again?

Will there be a day...ever...when 
With arms around your neck,
fingers running through your hair,
Drenching you in my tears,
I get to tell you... I get to tell you...

Do not worry, my love...

You haven't hurt me much.

You haven't hurt me much... Only as much as I love you!

Mulberries

I sit under this tree, the name of which I do not know,

The shadows so soothing and healing.
Birds chirruping all around,
tiny worms nourishing on fallen fruits. 

The fruits resemble mulberry, 

Like the ones I saw on my uncle's

Neighbor's terrace when I was young, 

So young that I hadn't 

Started bleeding.

So young that butterflies were just insects
And Chikkus were just fruits... 

How I wish I was there!

On that terrace, my tongue purple

From nibbling the mulberries

Will the bridge I see ahead of me,

Take me there, where I want to be.

Where I can twirl and twirl in my 
Red long skirt, never to lose a step, 

The merry land with sweet ripe berries.